"just between lovers"

i just watching "just between lovers" episode 13

and i'm crying so hard

but im not crying because the scene is so sad

jadi di scene itu, pemeran utama cewenya berantem bgt lah sama ibu nya trs diusir keluar, pokonya disitu dia bener-bener kayak hopeless gatau mau kemana bener-bener lagi sedih banget

dan pemeran utama cowonya aka pacarnya, terus samperin dia, comforting dia

dan disitu gue mikir "its nice to have someone you can lean on, its nice to have someone shoulder that you can cry"

kayak gue lagi ngerasa sepiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii banget.

bukan berarti gue pengen langsung cari cowo terus pacaran apa gimana

tapi kayak butuh seseorang yang bisa gue percaya dan bisa buat tempat cerita gue, bisa comfortin gue saat gue sedih.

kayak gue punya banyak banget temen, ada agni yang chat tiap hari sm gue ada bule ada nat ada meri ada dea ada karin
tapi kayak gue gamau cerita ke mereka, kayak gue gamau berbagi beban gue ke mereka

because i know maybe they dont care, they just basa basi
apalagi agni atau bule
gue kayak pernah cerita serius dan respon orang kayak yaudah  no sincerity sama sekali gue ngerasanya
dan lagi pula gue enek liat dan denger kata-kata "iya tes sabar ya gapapa kok it will be fine" "berdoa aja sama tuhan, percaya sama dia semua nya baik2 aja"

no its not. so just shut up i dont need to hear that

ah im so tired

bye